Patient Explanations #3

Trigger warning: this poem contains material related to panic attacks. Reader discretion is advised. 



Today started with the window open
The breeze was cool and calming
I could lean against the glass
Despite everything I was coping

Then suddenly I was torn from it
The window moved a few miles away
The breeze was gone taking the oxygen
Desperate for the windows peace to stay

I began clawing my way back
But gravity pulled harder each centimeter
Each breathe leaves me deprived
Crippled by my own created grim reaper

Hyperventilating I see my ruin
Imagining every disaster if I exist
The window is closed
I’m pulled into my own internal abyss

Everything is coated in horror
My heart racing with no finish line
Any action feels world ending
Existing feels unsafe to my mind

At last, I find a handhold
Anchoring me the cold ice burns
I clutch tightly to it
As safety slowly makes a return

I look up and see the window
It’s open, I feel the cold air
I rest my head upon the glass
And again I have peace there

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